I just want to write this down before I forget it. One thing that really made me think last night was that it's time for a paradigm shift.
I will clarify and say that my band is not giving me restriction yet. But, I do think I need to revisit my definition of full. Pre-op, my definition of full was I'm in pain. Discomfort. If I wore pants, unbuttoning them (I wear skirts, silly. Get your mind out of the gutter!).
Jessica pointed out that we need to think of the sensation we are looking for to be more satisfied than full. It's enough. I'm content. I'm not hungry any more.
Interesting how my perception of full is negative (pain, discomfort) while satisfied is positive (content). Could there be something to this new line of thinking?
Right now I am having a huge battle of wills. Shockingly, my banded stomach is still content from lunch (which was a mega sized salad with chicken) but my head is dying for some yogurt with Kashi. Instead of indulging in that 150 calorie treat (Kroger Vanilla Carb Master Yogurt + 1/3 cup Kashi Go Lean Honey and Almond Flax equals 150 calories, 3 g fat, 16 g carb--8 g fiber--and 15 g protein), I am focusing on writing to distract me, plus drinking lots of Crystal Light while reminding myself, this is what your head wants, not what your body needs. The yogurt and cereal will be there when you actually are hungry. It's not like now or never. Sheesh.
Dear Head, just shut the hell up.
So far so good. Can I continue to pull this off and survive the battle over the next two hours? Only time will tell.
If that doesn't work, then I'll remind myself of another Jessica-tidbit from last night. She said, "What part of the memo that we are no longer eating for fun did you not get?!?"
I'm half tempted to put that on the cover of my next food diary! I just started a new 3 month one, but I definitely think I will write that inside the front cover until time for a new one!